Well, I am NEGATIVE

Hello. This time, I will share you about something serious. Not really serious but something that you should know.

The "negative" word that's on the title means something that I recently knew. I know some of you may think of other thing, so let me tell you about my experience first.

I'm always afraid of hospital things. Even at this age, I will get shaken if I have to let myself to go to hospital. I am scared if I have to draw my bloods, get the check result, or even the smell of hospital makes me a little dizzy. In conclusion, I hate needles and seeing bloods. Seriously, I will act like a baby when I'm going to draw blood and I believe I'm not the only one, right?

But last year, I got curious of donating bloods. There was a feeling that I need to experience something that I haven't done and blood donation was the only thing acrossed my mind. Well, with the help of Twitter that gave me an info of the event and the promotions were somehow moving me. I knew that I was scared but my mind told me that somewhere out there, my blood was needed and I would make my life a little bit useful for the world. Okay, it was quite overwhelming but for a person who is scared of needles and blood, it was not.

Luckily, I have a friend with no experience of donating blood and also wanted to do once. She had another reason for donating that was more making me moved to do it. So we were going to the event and start our first donation. Although it was crowded, thankfully we didn't wait too long to get checked. I already knew my blood type, which was A, and my Hb was good to donate, so I passed to donate.

When I was laying and waiting for someone to draw my blood, I got nervous. Oh Hell, I also saw how big the needle was and coughed like crazy because of nervousness. But with the help of beginner's luck, the needles were sucking my blood so fast. Then I felt something. Donating my bloods were not really scary at all. Even I didn't feel the urge to be scared of needles. It was as if I felt nothing! Seriously! My body felt lighter and I didn't get dizzy like everybody said. I felt a little healthier and it was a good thing.

Do you ever feel when you're afraid of something and you try to find out why you get scared of it but instead you find nothing, somehow you start to not be afraid again? Because after donating, I was asking myself why should I was scared of needles and blood when I didn't even felt it hurt at all.

So that's really the first time I knew that I wouldn't be scared of them again and I got the pleasure of donating more and more.

But that's not the point of my story yet.

After that, not too long after i donated, I got a call from someone. Here's our conversation:

Hello, we're from PMI. Did you ever donate your blood at *(the event name)* ? // Yes. // Did you know your rhesus is negative? // Yes (I just said it spontaneously because I didn't even know what she was saying) // Okay, so the thing is we need your blood, may I know where do you live? // Bekasi. // Ah. Are you at home now? // Yes. But i need to go somewhere. // Okay, can you come to donate, like now? // No problem, where should I go? // To Kramat? // Can't I go to other places? // Sorry, but here is the headquarter of PMI and you can only donate here. Or maybe we can send the staff to your house? // What time? // Around 3 PM? // Sorry but I can't. I'm going to campus today. Other time, maybe? // Okay, we will call you next time, thanks.

Seriously, I was asking myself why would they had to come to me only for getting my blood, like am I that special or donating is really a rare thing for people? How can they lack in A type blood stocks, like seriously?

Then that was the time when I understood something. I looked up about what was this rhesus negative that she talked about. I didn't understand it before and just said yes unknowingly. And then I got shocked when I searched about it and asked to my friend to make sure what I read was right. And my friend confirmed what I just found.

Shortly, there are 2 rhesus type of blood, positive and negative. It is not only about A, B, O, or AB type, but the rhesus is needed to be known. Rh+ (Rhesus positive) is the common type while Rh- (Rhesus negative) is the rare type. It may be less than 15% of world population are born with it. Can you imagine it? If 15% is for entire world, what about in Indonesia only? And how much of them already know that they're Rh- ? And to be specific, how much of them are A- like me?

I also saw an article said that Rh- is more to be found (or commonly) in Europe than Asia or other countries. So I got excited at first knowing that maybe I have a little possibility of having caucasian blood on my veins (pardon my imagination but please continue reading).

Then, I also read an article saying that Rh- people may be originated from (or belong to) Nephilim or the Fallen Angels, which I found very exciting because of my interest in fiction novels and Nephilim stories to be exact. Seriously at a glance I feel attached to Nephilim and getting excited over an untrusted source.

BUT the rest infos are getting me more nervous. The fact that I will be getting a failure risk of pregnancy if I married to Rh+ and the baby will be Rh+ too (searching for a right husband is already hard and now I have to search for someone with Rh- too, seriously????) or the worst, IT IS A RARE TYPE. Which means, it will be hard to get one when you suddenly need it and the stock is limited. What if you're on crisis because of an accident?

Seriously? I just got excited over nothing. Being a descendant of Nephilim is useless when you're nobody actually and having difficulty to secure yourself in danger. Come on, in the halfway of life and death, how could I make it worse with the blood stocks? I mean, the time would be risky, and what if the hospital doesn't have one? Oh My God, it's horrible to imagine.

After my first donation in Kramat, i found myself is the only Rh- in my family, so they can't be a helper if I'm in need immediately. And somehow, I got to know that my great-great-great grandfather from my mother side is half dutch (which gives me several percentage of dutch blood that has no meaning totally in my physical appearance, thank you) that may be the reason for my Rh- blood.

So I decided to do something. I WILL dedicate my blood for those who share the fate with me, to expect they will do the same for me when I need in future. It's like feeding my good karma for my own life later. Because I believe that karma does exist, and if everyone do the same, then we will be just fine.

Later I found out that there is a community for Rh- people near us, with a good intention certainly. They help each other, give information, and gather people like me. Even though I am not active in the community, I am happy enough to see them. I tend to get in touch with Rh- staff in PMI and donate my blood whenever they called and if my condition is possible.

In conclusion, I need you to know what rhesus is yours. I know some of you may haven't known your blood type yet, so please check it ASAP, for your own sake.

If you're Rh- just like me, it will be not too late to do a good deed because out there, someone may need your blood to survive. But for the Rh+, you're also needed to donate because the demand for Rh+ is actually higher and your donation is always needed. Just think of what your donation can do to save people, and please, donating won't hurt than the deeds you will give to community.

So please please donate your blood. It will be an exciting experience and also a meaningful deed for some people and even yourself.

Thank you for reading and good night all!!
XOXO <3

[Recommendation] Boku wa Mari no Naka, A Great Psychological Manga

Well, frankly, maybe recommending this manga would spoil a little bit of myself. The genre of this manga is kinda mature, so I only recommend it for the proper age. But it doesn't really mean that... come on... I'm not really... well... never mind. I can assure you that this one wouldn't contain too much mature content. I could say that this manga is full of psychological side and mystery, so it will make you curious till the end.

Now I'm thinking for keeping it posted or not (hahaha). You can judge all you want, but seriously, this is the real deal. The manga itself hasn't completed yet. But it's already there around 60 chapters, so reading it now won't really hurt.

The story is about Komori, a loser guy who lived without any future. He met a high school girl and started to stalk her. But one day, he woke up as the girl, Mari. And that's how the body swapping begun. The most confusing part was when the real Komori was also living like the usual, by all means there were 2 conscious Komori. He then tried to find out what was happening to the real Mari inside the body and himself also.

The interesting part is about the concept of gender-bender/body swap. Usually the body swapping is about 2 soul that swapped to the opposite body. But instead, the boy's soul is passed to the girl's body when the girl's soul is still inside. In my opinion, it may be a case of MPD (Multiple Personality Disorder), but maybe it is not.

It still remains a mystery for what really happen to Komori. And although the plot is a little bit slow to reveal the cause one by one, the story is flowing smoothly, I think. There is also a confusing part when the best friend of Mari is involved. The mature scene only came out in less than 5 times and not really the main theme so they're still accepted. Anyway, please try reading it first. It's quite nice to kill the time.

Have a good day everyone!

Rate: 3.7 of 5

[Intermezzo] Being an Adult #1

I think I know why most women like flowers.

That's because flowers are always delivered in happy moments (e.g Graduation, Wedding, Anniversary).

I think I know why most women like jewellery.

That's because jewellery is such a precious thing that would be given by precious someone.

But there are so many things that I still don't understand. Maybe I am not so mature enough to know it now.

[One Shot] Stockholm Syndrome

“Lakukan apa yang kau mau, karena aku tidak pernah peduli,”

Anak gadis itu merengut ketika aku berkata kepadanya. Ia tidak bisa menerima kenyataannya. Raut wajahnya masih lengkap tergores sempurna dalam hatiku. Ia menahan rasa sakit hatinya.

“Kalau aku akan bunuh diri, apa kau juga tidak peduli ?” suaranya tak gentar.

Aku membalikkan badan, menghadapnya, melihat apakah ia benar-benar serius atau tidak. Ini sudah terjadi untuk ke sekian kalinya, cara tersebut memang paling ampuh untuk menekanku, dan untuk kali ini, aku tidak mau lagi.

“Kau masih hidup atau tidak, memang bukan urusanku,” jawabku, kembali meninggalkannya.

“Nike ! Nike !!” Chloe memanggilku dan berteriak, “ Aku akan bunuh diri !” ancamnya.

“Lakukan saja !” jawabku, menggertaknya. Coba saja, mana mungkin ia yang sepengecut itu berani menghabiskan hidupnya.

“Aku benar-benar akan bunuh diri !!” ia berteriak lagi.

“Terserah !” suaraku menyingkap ketidakpedulian yang begitu besar.

[Recommendation] Webtoon: Lookism

Okay, so these days I'm really into manhwa. What I mean is, I'm not in the mood for japanese manga, and prefer to webtoon, that is the cleaner version of manhwa. It's mainly because the dialogue and storyline of webtoon is delivered neatly. Unlike a book, webtoon is enjoyed by scrolling, just like reading a screenshot of a movie.

There are so many good webtoons that I liked. Can I have a list for it? Alright, let's see:

1. Noblesse (My first love of webtoon)

2. Pinocchio (I totally recommend this one but it's been a long time to me so I'm kinda forgetting the story ㅋㅋ)

3. Tales of the Unusual (A collection of horror stories, not really thrilling but amusing)

4. Vault of Horror (horror stories collection too)

5. He is a High School Girl (It's still ongoing and really funny)

6. 7. 8. So on and on and on...

Actually I forgot the other names and those 5 are the top-list that I keep seeing.

But this post is focused only for one webtoon! The one that makes my heart 'dugeun-dugeun' and waiting like hell.

LOOKISM.

Speaking of the author, I didn't realize at first that the name "Park Tae Jun" is the same person of ulzzang "Park Tae Jun". OMG seriously I knew him since around 2010 when he joined Ulzzang Generation Season 2 and that time I constantly visited his shopping mall, Aboki (only for looking his photoshoot). And this man is really one of a kind. How can a cute, good looking, and business man like him could draw a webtoon? Life is so unfair. And he also could sing, actually. Life is double unfair because of him.

Can we move right to the story? Here is the overview of Lookism:

Speaking of the story itself, Lookism is about an ugly high-schooler that got bullied by his friends and also got discrimination only because of his look. Then, he moved to another school and suddenly had another bodies and could swap it to one another. His other body is a strong and super good looking, so he got into a new school with that body. His new school is no different with his previous, the bullying was happening too.   But with his new body, he's living a new life. He got friends, girls were surrounding him, and he also tried to defend the bullied. Later, he was on his way to change himself by his experience in that new body.

There are so many plus points for this webtoon actually. First of all, the hot good looking character. How could I say this... They are handsome, strong and young, so why should I miss it? Then, they really know how to fight. It seems like school is for fight only, I think. But the people around Hyungsuk, the lead character, are really good people. I don't know, somehow it's really amusing and worth reading.

Second, the plot is really comical and heart-warming. I remembered laughing and sobbing while reading it. It has a perfect balance for everything, seriously.

Then, this is a really mega plus point for this webtoon. I got shocked when I found out about it. Park Tae Jun, you... Ah...

The character for this webtoon is based on a real people in the real world. That Park Hyung Suk as the lead is potrayed according to the model of Aboki with the same name. He is an ulzzang. For you who don't know the meaning of ulzzang, it's for good looking boys and girls in internet, shortly, they are like a internet celeb who get recognition by their looks.

When you're already fallen love with the character and then you found out there's someone out there with a figure just like what you dreamed...  You know how it feels, right?

Not only the lead character, I thought every character in the story is based on real people. The setting itself is also following the trend. It's like enjoying real people's story in real world, seriously. Yeah, like reading someone's diary. For example, the author put the real idols like BTS in conversation and girlgroup 2EYES performing PIPPI song.

And one more thing. Did you see the ads for Line Webtoon on Youtube or TV? Yes, it shows the live action version of Lookism. In case you didn't realize it, here is a screenshot of it:

It would be great if those popular webtoon, such as Noblesse and also Lookism to have a live action, in anime version or maybe a drama. Anyway, seeing Lookism was chosen as one of the Line Webtoon's ads, it means this webtoon already gained a big popularity.

Actually, I didn't follow the chapters via the app, because in my country version, it goes really slow while the original already passed more than 50 chapters. I choose to rely on online manga sites that releases faster.

At the end, I really reccommend this one. It's perfect for girls or boys, with a full package of everything and totally interesting. I simply lack of words to explain it, though.

It's 5 of 5 stars for everything with a freshly big heart from me.

MAKE SURE YOU DON'T EVER MISS IT, OKAY?

Have a good day, everyone.

[One Shot] A Piece of an Introvert's Diary

Kupikir pada awalnya, tidak ada yang mengerti jalan pikiranku. Ya, mereka semua tidak tahu.

Kalaupun ada seseorang yang berkata memahamiku, mereka tidak tahu apa artinya itu. Bagaimana semua ini bagiku, bagaimana aku melihat semua dalam persepsiku sendiri.

Terkadang aku merasa peperangan ini seperti aku melawan seluruh dunia. Dicari ke ujung bagian manapun, tidak ada yang bisa bersekutu denganku.

Aku bertahan pada sebuah pijakan batu kecil dan menopang diriku sendiri. Selagi mereka semua berjalan dan bergerak, aku diam tak bersuara. Hanya bayanganku yang mengekori gerakan mereka. 

Perlahan, beberapa menghampiriku dan bertanya-tanya. Tembok besar menghadang mereka dan jawabanku selalu sama.

Diam. Tertawa palsu dan kembali diam. Mengalihkan pembicaraan kalau memang dibutuhkan. Karena semua orang suka membicarakan diri sendiri, maka berikan pertanyaan mengenai kehidupan dan masalah mereka.

Tembok itu tidak akan runtuh. Untuk sekian lamanya, tembok itu kokoh berdiri melindungiku. Pijakanku masih berada pada tempatnya. Aku, sekali lagi akan selamat dari arus mereka.

The Tendency as an Aries person

I read an article when I was in middle high school. It said what kind of stories that someone should make based on their horoscope.

I am Aries and it's written that I should be more focus on short stories, because we tend to easily get bored with one idea.

And years later, I could agree with that. I tried myself to create a long-term project but it always stuck in the middle. I might have tons of incomplete titles, with a lot of revisions and still haven't completed yet.

But when I made a short stories, I kinda feel enjoyed. It didn't really need a long time to finished it while I was getting busy with another idea.

I'm only saying that the article is right. Whoever the author of that article, he did a great analysis and I could related to it.

And I actually had a long story on hold. It's really hard to me to get in a right mood for one title and... Yeah, it hasn't been completed. I'm a little confused about the ending. Maybe it won't get published anyway.

Ah... I'm terribly sorry...