Spotify Wrapped 2021, A Throwback of My Own 2021

I was actually curious on how my Spotify Wrapped on 2021 would turn out to be. By looking at the list of my most listened songs, I could remind on how my years had been going on.

On 2019,

My top artist was Getsunova while top song was ความเงียบดังที่สุด (The Loudest Silence) by Getsunova.

I had started obsessed with Thai Pop Culture on early 2018.  It all started with series, then shows and went to the pop music. It was also the early stage of my fujoshi re-awakening and Thai served it well. While trying to learn on how to pronounce the word and sing along, at the late of 2018 there was a trailer of an upcoming series, Theory of Love and it featured The Loudest Silence song. I loved it so much up to the point I couldn't wait and decided to read the novel instead. Well, at early 2019 I spent my time reading the book while listening to the song that fitted perfectly.

I loved Theory of Love, obsessed with them but sadly, I had a high expectation already and the series did not deliver it well. It didn't even have the same spark as the first trailer though. It seemed I was too in love with the book and even though I pictured Khai as Off Jumpol, they were sort of different.

On 2020,

My Top Artist was Seventeen while My Top Song was 안아줘  (Hug Me) by Joong Joon-il.

Oh right, Seventeen was like a savior to me during stay-at-home period due to Covid-19. Most of the top 10 songs were not even 2020 release, just like Hug Me by Joong Joon-il. The reason I repeatedly listened to the song was due to Erha Novel or The Husky and His White Cat Shizun by Meatbun Doesn't Eat Meat. After 2019 was filled with Danmei and I read all of MXTX novels already, I decided to read other popular novel with a huge fandom as well. It's difficult to say that I love the novel already since it involved adultery and Moran 0.5 was too wild and immoral to me. It just didn't make sense at first. But I got dragged and still enjoyed it enough even though the plotline was not really my favorite.

Hug Me song was my own OST for reading the book, and since I took quite a time reading the book (unlike MXTX novels), that's why it became #1. It's as simple as that.

On 2021,

So many things happened to me. On real life actually not that much, but as a fangirl that always crave for anything to obsess, I was even surprised by myself. After several jump and landed on Thailand, on Mid 2021, I was forced to jump on Vietnam. Not really forced, perhaps I should say "suggestively". It all started when I discovered Tự Tâm by Nguyễn Trần Trung Quân. The MV had a BL theme, that's why Youtube recommended such video to me. And I was hypnotized, especially because of the video clip plot, the settings and also the featured model, Denis Dang. I was too stunned with that fine-looking grey and long haired guy on the screen.

One more thing that made me decided to stay in Vietpop was the language. After struggling to read Thai and learn aksorn very much (and I was still far from fluent), I was more than happy to learn Vietnamese though. At least it's quite similar to latin, pretty much. And then, that's how I met the one.

Son Tung MTP.

The first clip that I watched was Nơi Này Có Anh. It had a massive views on Youtube and honestly the song was also addictive. After the first song then came to other great songs. I ended up loving his music style very much. And for his singles, I was very satisfied. Anyone would see his efforts for each clip. I started to love everything about him, I could see a real artist in him and he deserved to be loved too. I stan such a talent and I was grateful for having a chance to know him.

And then I became addicted to Chúng Ta Của Hiện Tại. I am not a good reviewer though, I can only say that the music was perfect. It had an indescribable vibe that made me want to repeat more. It's like a BGM, I could imagine the story whenever I listened to it. Oh, was it because of the video clip? It had a decent plot and I loved the theme too. Anyway, if I'm not mistaken, I started to repeatedly play the song from September and surprisingly it became the #1 in a short time. Hi, Sir, I'm not sure if you're reading this (and I never expect to happen too), I only want to say something to you,

Thank you for being you.

I may have known you for short time, but I enjoyed it very much. Whenever I see you and enjoy your work, I am happy to know that I support a real talent. You give a new color to my life and I am grateful to discover you.

I hope I am able to witness your performance in person, and how lucky I will be for that.

My #2 Artist was STAMP, a Thai singer with a lovely voice and his everlasting song, มันคงเป็นความรัก (It's Probably Love) that I already listened since 2018 and it still topped the chart due to the latest music video for the song that he uploaded last year and he added the English translation and it made the song more meaningful and cut too deep.

At that time I also listened to Erik and he became the #3 most listened artist because of some of his songs but I usually played them fairly, some of my favorites were Em Không Sai Chúng Ta Sai, Đừng Xin Lỗi Nữa and his latest song, Dịu Dàng Em Đến.

As Tilly Birds being my #4, I wouldn't be too surprised. I listened to their singles a lot, literally, but surprisingly none of them being the top 5. Perhaps it was the same case as Erik's songs, I usually put some songs on loop, not specifically repeat one. But Tilly Birds was a must-listened for Thaipop. Their notable singles during 2021 were เพื่อนเล่น ไม่เล่นเพื่อน (Just Being Friendly), ลู่วิ่ง (Can't Keep Up), เดอะแบก (Baggage), and เบื่อคนขี้เบื่อ (I'm Not Boring, You're Just Bored). Well, those were all of their singles on 2021 though. Each of them had their own style and characters, I was satisfied on how they did not really use the copy-paste-improve method to their next single, so I dedicated my biggest praise for them. Ah... This year... I admitted my playlist were so colorful.

Lastly, my #5 Artist was Mika Hashizume, one of Chuang 2021 (China's Produce 101) contestant and recently a member of INTO1. I loved him exactly after he sang to 永不失聯的愛 (Unbreakable Love) by Eric Chou and So Sick by NeYo which was the 1st episode of Chuang 2021. He was my first pick, continued with Liu Yu, Rikimaru, and Santa. All of them were made it to the member of INTO1 and I couldn't be happier. He had a lovely voice that made everyone melted at once. I loved seeing him as my #5 which means that I had a moment to be crazy of Chuang 2021 a lot. I watched them and remember more than half of the contestant though.

Well, that's how my life had been on 2021, and I hope to discover more exciting part of the world that I haven't know yet in next year. And one more thing, I wish all on-hold project to be released soon without delay anymore.

With love,

S.

2021: Another Milestone of Danmei Exploration

Hi. At this point, I realized that I have no turning back to the real world once I deliberately draw into Danmei world. And this whole post will be dedicated to the list of my notable milestones of Danmei up until end of year 2021. I really wanted to create a milestone like this since I always ended up forgetting the list of everything I watched/read.

At first, I created this post for the Q2 milestone, but then it got delayed up until at the end of the year. Heh, I really must appreciate my inconsistency to post regularly.

2021 Jan
Papa Wolf and the Puppy (Manhua)

cr: 麻尾

I'm not sure that this manhua should be included in the danmei tag because up until now, there's no romance at all.

But, this has a similar pattern as 19 Days and the art itself is quite similar. It is a one shot manhua type with a very short scene for each chapter and it's still ongoing. But it is cuter and lovelier in such a way.

It mostly involves around as its name, a papa wolf who picked up a puppy. It started as a real wolf and pup at first but it then came out as a real person, a mafia boss with a wild boy which had a very cute interactions. It is mostly shown a fatherly love but along with the growth of the puppy, it's expected to see a romance imho. Yes, it reminded me of Sha Po Lang in a cutesy way.

Anyway, I love the scenes a lot! And I am thankful to find this manhua as a refreshment. Even though it was because of the hotness and coolness of Papa wolf, but it couldn't be ignored how lovely the puppy as well.

cr: 麻尾

 

2021 Feb
ShaPoLang (Novel) - Dropped

Yes, I dropped the Shapolang after realized that I'm not really into a political conflict that much. I started a year already and it nearly took me a year to finish the half of it but the rest... I must say that the steampunk themed with political issues are not my thing. First, I was hardly able to imagine the arcs and it seemed hard to find any guidance from any fanart. Low-key opinion? Maybe they were also hesitant on how to visualize the story arcs as well. Secondly, the plot itself was too much involving a political strategy which, was a yawn to me. I wasn't too interested with the plot. Another point was, there was this issue of "bone of impurity" which mentioned several times at first but just had explained at the half of story. It felt like I was dragging many questions in my mind and finally able to understand the situation on later chapters.

Anyway, I decided to drop the novel and might continue right after the series came out. I was hesitant on what to read for next, but later on, I regretted nothing.

 

Quickly Wear a Face of Devil (Novel)

cr: Kinokuniya

Comparing to Heaven Official's Blessing, it's really neck-to-neck. The title was "Quickly Wear a Face of Devil" which got me hooked easily from the start of story. Even for Heavens Official Blessing or TGCF, I was quite hesitant to continue at first since the most hooked part was started right when Hua Cheng appeared and it's already ten-to-something chapters. I must finished the first arc first actually.

But for QWFOD, it's really different. It's such a gem to find the quick transmigration novel that is easily hooked during first story/arc. The story is about Zhou Yun Sheng, a genius hacker who was trapped in a system that made him rebirth into many worlds as a villain. He then tried to change his fate and gave the heroine lessons.

A Look Back at The Past: FLY HIGH, MY FLY TO THE SKY...

Halo,

Tinggal beberapa bulan lagi sebelum akhirnya kita merayakan 2nd Anniversary of Living in a Pandemic Life dan ketika gue menemukan notifikasi dari Google Photos yang terlalu berinisiatif membuat video memori beberapa tahun belakangan di minggu-minggu ini, jadilah emosi gue kembali labil terutama waktu gue sadar kalau ternyata,

    I successfully celebrated Fly to The Sky Debut Anniversary by Watching Their Concert in Korea for 2 Times Straight   

 

Left: 19th Anniversary Concert (2018) Right: 20th Anniversary Concert (2019)

It is more like a satisfactory achievement of a fangirl though.

Sebenarnya gue bukan fangirl mereka yang benar-benar ngikutin mereka dari awal (karena gue ga setua itu juga) tetapi gue emang udah tergila-gila dari comeback mereka di 2014 dan sejak itu hidup gue berubah. Semua ini emang gara-gara 너를 너를 너를, sih. Karena gue sadar gue ketinggalan one of greatest singers in Korea, gue pakai sistem sks buat mengejar ketertinggalan gue sebagai seorang fangirl waktu itu. Di masa-masa itu juga cukup menderita bagi gue karena [1] konten mereka kurang sekali [2] international fans mereka itu agak memperihatinkan (kecuali Jepang) jadi beberapa informasi perlu dicerna mentah-mentah aja.

Gue juga inget dan sadar, berdoa supaya mereka konser disini itu terlalu mustahil juga karena bahkan gue kesulitan buat cari fanaccount Indo, apalagi dengan base yang bisa buat promotor ngelirik. Bahkan sampai hari inipun, gue semakin ragu kalau jumlahnya berkembang sih. Ditambah lagi, kpoppers generasi sekarang juga bakal ngerasa kalau mereka ini cocoknya jadi sejarah aja kali ya 😂. Waktu itu keluarlah obsesi gue buat menjadi promotor namun hilang sekejap ketika tahu jadi promotor khususnya KPop Concert itu bakal batin banget. Target market gue terlalu ababil dan cerewet, apalagi target event gue kayaknya ga bakal bikin cuan juga deh.

Di tahun 2017, gue merasa menyesal saat sadar kalau gue baru aja melewatkan konser mereka di tahun itu! Padahal waktunya cuma <2 bulan dari kali pertama gue menjajakkan kaki di Korea waktu itu. Dan ga mungkin dong gue balik lagi hanya demi nonton mereka? Gue tidak setajir itu pada saat itu juga, ditambah visa gue masih single entry, udah gitu gue gapunya jatah cuti yang cukup lagi dan ditambah, gue ga ada teman yang bisa diajak gila bareng buat asal terbang-nonton-pulang gitu aja.

Long story short, di 2018 gue melancong lagi ke Korea 2 kali, di awal dan akhir tahun, tapi jadwalnya agak main tembak aja, toh plan-nya udah dari lama dan ga ada aroma-aromanya FTTS bakal bikin konser lagi. Gue cuma berdoa aja, kalau jodoh gabakal kemana. Dan YES di akhir tahun pas banget jadwal trip gue berbarengan sama jadwal konser mereka. Rasanya itu kayak... susah dijelaskan pokoknya.

Kali pertama nonton konser di Korea, gue agak ga yakin kalo ini experience yang sama yang bakal dirasain kalo nonton konser lainnya sih.

Late New Year Message: A Look Back of 2019 and Such

Hi, hello again.

Even though that 2020 is just started and even not yet passed a month, I must admit that this whole year will pretty much be 2019.2. Since 2019 was not a very good year, but I still have a high hope for this year. Let's just be positive.

And I realized that I had many things to tell during 2019 but did not come up at the end. So I just grab the draft and put it here, then added some words also.

First report of 2019.

I failed to suppress my impulsivity and aborted the mission already. It turned out that if I refrain myself, I thought that I would somehow lost my identity. I felt that I was not accepting myself and there was no point of doing that anymore. I wanted to love myself more than doing anything that seemed the best. I tried to acknowledge that loving and accepting the real "you" can be considered as a big improvement.

So I, as a biggest supporter of myself, will support whatever my heart wants and yearn for. Whatever it is, however impulsive it is.

Oh yes, I would love to take a journey to another place again. I would let myself go wherever I want to. I want to live at the fullest. I want to have no regret at all.

Actually my biggest resolution for 2019 was not to spend my savings for traveling, again. I used up lots of them during 2018. Then I got upset knowing that I had no money savings at all. But then, turned out that I could not do it and ended up booking flight tickets.

That's when I realized that actually I cannot refrain myself to not travel since that is my passion. I feel so alive whenever I get started to plan the whole journey, as if I get a boost of life motivation. So the trick is, to split the my saving pocket between long term and short term plan. But to ask whether I am success for that... I am still figuring out.


Second report, and one of the main issue of the first quarter, is that I discovered a new world to obsess. This is already being my weakness and habit. To have at least something to obsess over.

If you know me well in real world, I always tend to be a devoted fangirl of something. It can be about a comic, novel, artist, or even idols. Once I laid my eyes on something, I become obsessed. But now, I learn that there is a chance of me to like this "kind of" world.

This world, even though at first I have never been interested, even questioned why people can be obsessed over it, but more I learn it, more interesting to me now. It provided me such a new insight, a new viewpoint, and get to learn a new culture. It can be a positive or negative approach, depends on how you see it. But I must say this insight are too interesting to learn since it is very different but somehow it is also quite familiar.

I once posted a Yaoi recommendation and my viewpoint about homosexual. I was "once or twice" okay with some BLs (from now on, let's use BL rather than Yaoi, okay?), but that's it. Then it took me such a long time and courage to finally accept that now I can be considered as a fujoshi.

You read it right. Fujoshi.

If you're not familiar with the word, Fujoshi is a term for a fangirl of BL genre. And I am one of them, with a condition, and I am strictly limited to certain BL I still have the same viewpoint as I had before. So my only condition is that, as long as the quality is there and it is not only lust. So, prepare yourself that I will post more about BL and recommend you any of them.

So, those two reports, two discoveries, which I gladly accept as a part of me. I will continuously live as an impulsive and a fujoshi, as long as I am enjoy with them. So 2020 is truly a 2019.2 even for my own self. I don't change much and also don't want to. I seek only happiness and pursue any desire. And that is how I want to spend my life with.

From a selfish person who wish to be more than before,


Please enjoy this year as much as you can.

Well, I am NEGATIVE

Hello. This time, I will share you about something serious. Not really serious but something that you should know.

The "negative" word that's on the title means something that I recently knew. I know some of you may think of other thing, so let me tell you about my experience first.

I'm always afraid of hospital things. Even at this age, I will get shaken if I have to let myself to go to hospital. I am scared if I have to draw my bloods, get the check result, or even the smell of hospital makes me a little dizzy. In conclusion, I hate needles and seeing bloods. Seriously, I will act like a baby when I'm going to draw blood and I believe I'm not the only one, right?

But last year, I got curious of donating bloods. There was a feeling that I need to experience something that I haven't done and blood donation was the only thing acrossed my mind. Well, with the help of Twitter that gave me an info of the event and the promotions were somehow moving me. I knew that I was scared but my mind told me that somewhere out there, my blood was needed and I would make my life a little bit useful for the world. Okay, it was quite overwhelming but for a person who is scared of needles and blood, it was not.

Luckily, I have a friend with no experience of donating blood and also wanted to do once. She had another reason for donating that was more making me moved to do it. So we were going to the event and start our first donation. Although it was crowded, thankfully we didn't wait too long to get checked. I already knew my blood type, which was A, and my Hb was good to donate, so I passed to donate.

When I was laying and waiting for someone to draw my blood, I got nervous. Oh Hell, I also saw how big the needle was and coughed like crazy because of nervousness. But with the help of beginner's luck, the needles were sucking my blood so fast. Then I felt something. Donating my bloods were not really scary at all. Even I didn't feel the urge to be scared of needles. It was as if I felt nothing! Seriously! My body felt lighter and I didn't get dizzy like everybody said. I felt a little healthier and it was a good thing.

Do you ever feel when you're afraid of something and you try to find out why you get scared of it but instead you find nothing, somehow you start to not be afraid again? Because after donating, I was asking myself why should I was scared of needles and blood when I didn't even felt it hurt at all.

So that's really the first time I knew that I wouldn't be scared of them again and I got the pleasure of donating more and more.

But that's not the point of my story yet.

After that, not too long after i donated, I got a call from someone. Here's our conversation:

Hello, we're from PMI. Did you ever donate your blood at *(the event name)* ? // Yes. // Did you know your rhesus is negative? // Yes (I just said it spontaneously because I didn't even know what she was saying) // Okay, so the thing is we need your blood, may I know where do you live? // Bekasi. // Ah. Are you at home now? // Yes. But i need to go somewhere. // Okay, can you come to donate, like now? // No problem, where should I go? // To Kramat? // Can't I go to other places? // Sorry, but here is the headquarter of PMI and you can only donate here. Or maybe we can send the staff to your house? // What time? // Around 3 PM? // Sorry but I can't. I'm going to campus today. Other time, maybe? // Okay, we will call you next time, thanks.

Seriously, I was asking myself why would they had to come to me only for getting my blood, like am I that special or donating is really a rare thing for people? How can they lack in A type blood stocks, like seriously?

Then that was the time when I understood something. I looked up about what was this rhesus negative that she talked about. I didn't understand it before and just said yes unknowingly. And then I got shocked when I searched about it and asked to my friend to make sure what I read was right. And my friend confirmed what I just found.

Shortly, there are 2 rhesus type of blood, positive and negative. It is not only about A, B, O, or AB type, but the rhesus is needed to be known. Rh+ (Rhesus positive) is the common type while Rh- (Rhesus negative) is the rare type. It may be less than 15% of world population are born with it. Can you imagine it? If 15% is for entire world, what about in Indonesia only? And how much of them already know that they're Rh- ? And to be specific, how much of them are A- like me?

I also saw an article said that Rh- is more to be found (or commonly) in Europe than Asia or other countries. So I got excited at first knowing that maybe I have a little possibility of having caucasian blood on my veins (pardon my imagination but please continue reading).

Then, I also read an article saying that Rh- people may be originated from (or belong to) Nephilim or the Fallen Angels, which I found very exciting because of my interest in fiction novels and Nephilim stories to be exact. Seriously at a glance I feel attached to Nephilim and getting excited over an untrusted source.

BUT the rest infos are getting me more nervous. The fact that I will be getting a failure risk of pregnancy if I married to Rh+ and the baby will be Rh+ too (searching for a right husband is already hard and now I have to search for someone with Rh- too, seriously????) or the worst, IT IS A RARE TYPE. Which means, it will be hard to get one when you suddenly need it and the stock is limited. What if you're on crisis because of an accident?

Seriously? I just got excited over nothing. Being a descendant of Nephilim is useless when you're nobody actually and having difficulty to secure yourself in danger. Come on, in the halfway of life and death, how could I make it worse with the blood stocks? I mean, the time would be risky, and what if the hospital doesn't have one? Oh My God, it's horrible to imagine.

After my first donation in Kramat, i found myself is the only Rh- in my family, so they can't be a helper if I'm in need immediately. And somehow, I got to know that my great-great-great grandfather from my mother side is half dutch (which gives me several percentage of dutch blood that has no meaning totally in my physical appearance, thank you) that may be the reason for my Rh- blood.

So I decided to do something. I WILL dedicate my blood for those who share the fate with me, to expect they will do the same for me when I need in future. It's like feeding my good karma for my own life later. Because I believe that karma does exist, and if everyone do the same, then we will be just fine.

Later I found out that there is a community for Rh- people near us, with a good intention certainly. They help each other, give information, and gather people like me. Even though I am not active in the community, I am happy enough to see them. I tend to get in touch with Rh- staff in PMI and donate my blood whenever they called and if my condition is possible.

In conclusion, I need you to know what rhesus is yours. I know some of you may haven't known your blood type yet, so please check it ASAP, for your own sake.

If you're Rh- just like me, it will be not too late to do a good deed because out there, someone may need your blood to survive. But for the Rh+, you're also needed to donate because the demand for Rh+ is actually higher and your donation is always needed. Just think of what your donation can do to save people, and please, donating won't hurt than the deeds you will give to community.

So please please donate your blood. It will be an exciting experience and also a meaningful deed for some people and even yourself.

Thank you for reading and good night all!!
XOXO <3

Intermezzo: Recently Played Musics

1. Muse - Mercy

As usual, Muse is never failed to amuse me. This time, while listening to this song and close my eyes, it's like imagining myself on a Colosseum, but why? I don't really get it but it means good, like a grand song!

2. Hailee Steinfeld - Love Myself

"Gonna love myself, no, I don't need anybody else" This song is like a remedy to me whenever i feel down.

3. Shannon Williams - Why Why

The one thing that I love about this song is because it reminds me of a typical k-pop song! You know a cute, bright, cheerful, bla bla blah. Even though it's not sung by a korean, but she's good, for real. I love everything about this song. When i said everything, it means including the performance, concept, lyric, voice, EVERY ASPECT OF IT! It's quite sad knowing it wasn't too success, but this song always gives me a positive energy.

4. Fly To The Sky - It Happens To Be That Way & If I Had To Have You

Not a catchy name for a song title, right? But recently, I'm addicted to their newest mini-album, like seriously. I listened to them while dozing off at midnight. It's good, f*ckin' real good. And one thing for sure, i'm already captivated by Hwanhee's voice.

5. Hwanhee - Don't Go Away

It's from his H-Hour Album and I got upset like hell when i realized how good it is. I really like the title song, "While Doing" so i didn't get to listen other songs so I'm repeating this song until I'll get sick of it later. Hwanhee, you... You handsome, manly witch! What kind of spell did you cast, huh?

6. DAY6 - Congratulations

This song is the fastest to be one of my "Most Played" playlist on iTunes. Once I heard it, I suddenly fell in love. It's not a ballad song, not an upbeat too, and it perfectly matched my ideal song's beat. It turned out to be a sad song, but I would get happier whenever I listen to it. I don't really get it why they never performed in any music program, and their debut promotion is quite lacking. BUT SERIOUSLY? IT'S A GREAT SONG PERFORMED BY A GREAT GROUP TOO YOU ROTTED AGENCY!

7. Roy Kim - You Don't Love Me

It's an OST for a Korean Drama "Twenty Again". I'm enjoying the drama, but I listened to the OST first. It's really... It doesn't need any word, come on, it's Roy Kim!

[Recommendation] 100% PERFECT GIRL That is Just Like FIRST GIRL Doppelganger

I have read FIRST Girl manga long time a go, and it was one of Saito Chiho's masterpiece, at least for me. Actually, she is my first-top list of my favorite author. The reason is, she magically put the erotic scenes in a right time with a right composition. And she is the one that brought me to ecchi manga.

First Girl itself was about a struggle of a man and a woman who both madly in love to be together. It was harder than you could imagine, really. Leon Rosas (omg i remember the names perfectly without checking again) was a business tycoon and Miu was just an average Japanese girl. They married happily at first, but something occured and separated them. Miu then met other men that helped her but also lured by her beauty. Leon Rosas was hardly finding Miu, his bride all over country.

Miu & Leon Rosas in Vol. 1 Cover

This manga stirred up my mind. Oh my God, Miu was a slut, and i'm saying this with a reason. No, a lot of reason. Just take a look at the vol. 2 cover.

There is no Leon Rosas in the cover, and it means the lead man has changed. If you see through another volume, the lead man is always changing, and finally Leon appears in the last volume cover. In every volume, Miu was really having an affair with different men, and it ended up with Leon apologized her. Come on, she is the true portrait of living bitch. I hate her really much and regretting why Leon fell for her. Because of you're separated with your husband, it doesn't mean you're free to sleep with another man, b*tch.

Anyway, Saito Chiho is always my favorite mangaka. Even though i hate Miu so much, but deep in ever woman's heart, who doesn't want to be surrounded by hot-looking men who will love you more than their lives?

Long after reading this manga, recently i found an interesting one again that has similarity with First Girl. It's a manhwa, actually, and titled 100% Perfect Girl.

Let me tell you the synopsis of this one. Jay was a korean art school student who met with Jarte, the King of Roinne by accident. Jarte was immersed with Jay and followed her in silence. After short meetings, Jarte was proposing to Jay and asked her to live in Roinne. Jay didn't accept his proposal at first because she wasn't sure if she loved Jarte. So they engaged first.

Jarte is a man with troubled mind. He had a great fear of losing someone he loves. Because of Jay was the first and the only girl that he loved, he became over-protective to her. Their sweet moments then disappeared suddenly after Jay's missing. She was involved in a mafia's war and lost her memories. Then, she met with Luigi. Luigi was the head of mafia gangsters that Jay saved from a bullet shot. Luigi was fallen for her and hid Jay in his place. Jarte was desperately finding Jay everywhere with all his might. At the end, he found Jay at the bed, naked, with Luigi. The amnesia Jay didn't know who Jarte is, but already in love with Luigi. At the end, after her memories came back, she realized how much she had broken Jarte's heart. 

Living as a king of Roinne meant having a lot of enemy. Clarence Ewan was actually his step brother that lived brutally and wanting to avenge Jarte. He used Jay as his bait, but suddenly began to be fond of her. After occurrence by occurrence, Jay was trying to get away from Jarte and ended their engagement to create a new life. But fate had united them together, and finally opened up all of obstacles that they went through.

Okay, i'm sorry if i haven't told that it contains spoiler. But my explanation is not enough to express what happened to Jarte and Jay. You should try reading it. For the first time, i'm startled when looking the comments, saying how much they hated this story but always repeated reading it. I never understood until i happened to read it. I hate this story very much. It makes you happy at first but suddenly the situation went dark. It makes you anxious, waiting for the light will come, but the new problem walk in instead. You will never find any anxious drama more than this. It has a typical korean drama, a tug war of feelings with just 2 persons. It's only about Jarte and Jay, about their feelings to each other, but i don't know why it became so complicated. Even after finish reading it, i have an urge to start reading it again. Maybe that's why the others ended up with repeating the chapter again.

"J is looking for J"

There is a phrase of advertisement that Jarte placed all over Korea to find Jay. It's really sweet, though. He even placed a huge billboard with lights at the top of hills, where he finally found Jay again. I always remembered that phrase, wondering how romantic he did.

Jay is a psycho.

Yes, he even called himself like that. If you read it, you must be agreed with me. But, because of his wit, his looks, his charm, and also his wealth, he is just a guy who was madly in love, so mad in point of able to lock up the girl. I never saw an obsessed man like him before. He is just a monster, a cute and charming monster. He can't let Jay lost from his sight. If i was Jay, i would absolutely escape from him like she did. It is frightening to love with someone like Jarte. If only he was not a king with perfect material, it will become a horror story, right?

100% Perfect Girl

The title is inspired by Haruki Murakami's beautiful short story, "On Seeing The 100% Perfect Girl One Beautiful April Morning". It is truly a good story, for me. Reading the short story made me begin to understand why can Jarte be madly in love with Jay. 'So there is this kind of impression', i think.

In conclusion, i find them both have similarities with the stories, don't you think? It's about the struggles of uniting a man and woman who loves each other. They also are filled with men's harem who helped and loved the lead woman at once. And both of them have great artworks that matched with my liking.

I recommend both actually. They are good and worth reading. Rate? Here it is (of 5) :

First Girl = 3.7 for Story ; 4.5 for Artwork

100% Perfect Girl = 4.3 for Story ; 3.6 for Artwork

Please read them, okay?

Have a good day everyone!!

KHOOBSURAT

I am not reviewing anything right now.

Recently, i watched a hindi movie called Khoobsurat. FYI, if you're unfamiliar with the movie, Khoobsurat had a collaboration with Disney Pictures. And that's why i was so curious to watch.

When i knew that it was included into Disney movie, the only thing that went into my mind was, "Yes! This is a hindi version of another Disney princess stories". And based on the synopsis, i was right. The story was about a cinderella-like story, with a bit of modern touch (nah, it's hindi btw, so it wasn't just a bit).

Let's just stop with the intermezzo.

I must say... after i watched this... the only thing i knew was...

I just had a fever...

You know...

It's #FAWADFEVER !!!! (lol)

Fawad is the Prince. Please just watch the movie, and i assure you, he is such a hottie. Fawad Khan is a pakistani (yeaaaay) that acted as a prince of India. Well, it's a little bit confusing, why should a pakistani was chosen, but if you looked at him, it wouldn't be a matter anymore.

The story is about a romantic hopeless girl who lived in a palace as a physiotherapist for the disabled king. The girl, Milli Chakravarty is a passionate, free, and bright but clumsy girl, while the prince, Vikram Rathore is an old-fashioned, rigid, and boring man. Milli had a such attitude that really misfit with the royal tradition. As the time passes, they started to have interest with each other, and boom, love happened.

The love story is really cute. They suddenly kissed each other out of the blue. The prince already had a fiancee and they were ready to get married. The conflict is when Milli and Fawad tried to be open about their feelings and started their love line.

There were so many beautiful places showed in the movie. "Khoobsurat" itself means Beauty, and i could see the beauty in every aspect of this movie. I really loved this one, i must say. The portion for everything is perfect, and i highly recommend you to watch it, especially for Disney enthusiast like me.

Well...

Happy Watching^^

(This is the official poster of Khoobsurat) <3

[Recommendation] Zekkyou Gakkyuu for Horror Enthusiast !

Hi.

 

It's been a long time. Seriously, gue sangat sering baca komik. Tetapi entah mengapa buat membahas satu persatu disini... it's hard, really hard. Karena gue juga cukup tidak berbakat untuk merekomendasikan komik apa saja yang patut dibaca, I mean, gue cukup kesulitan untuk bisa membujuk orang lain buat baca apa yang gue baca. Whatever.

 

Belakangan ini gue terlalu bosan buat baca genre-genre yang overly mainstream (read: shoujo) dan bubbly-bubbly gimana gitu. Dan hell yeah, entah dapat wangsit darimana gue akhirnya terobsesi dengan genre horror dan thriller.

 

Mungkin gue adalah salah satu dari orang-orang super labil dan gajelas maunya apa. But I admit it. Dulu gue super penakut. Tapi sekarang... I'm so into horror-thing. Well, for a newbie, it's really hard to find a worth-reading manga. Banyak rekomendasi yang menunjukkan gue ke cerita nonsense dan kesan horornya itu lebih mengarah ke gory image yang sangat sangat menjijikkan. It's bad for your eyes.

 

Contoh ?

 

Uzumaki ? Apocalypse no Toride ? Kami-sama no Iutoori ni ?

 

Shit. Selama gue obsessed dengan komik-komik horror, mimpi buruk gue juga berubah. Belakangan ini gue tergila-gila dengan Shingeki no Kyojin (Attack on Titan), seriously, who would not love this one. Setelah itu gue juga baca Kami-sama no Iutoori ni dan dengan sangat kreatifnya otak gue merangkai mimpi buruk gue menjadi hal seperti ini,

 

I trapped in a high school, with a lot of ugly titans around the place, eagerly haunted me and trying to eat my brain.

 

Trust me, mimpi kayak begitu lebih seram dibandingkan dikejar-kejar siluman ular putih ala medusa yang rambutnya itu ular putih.

 

Ah, mulai kurang fokus gue sekarang. Anyway,  gue bakal merekomendasikan komik horror yang benar-benar worth-to-read. 

 

ZEKKYOU GAKKYUU. Here is the cover:

 

 



Yeay ! It's time for screaming lessons !!!

 

Zekkyou Gakkyuu is the type of "horror story collection" manga. There is always different story each chapter, and that's the good point. I really appreciate the author for making me kind of shock for the ending. He/she surprisingly created a creepy ending for every stories. There is no spooky thing or gory image, I assure you. I even thought that the stories is made for children by giving a lesson for making them a better character. Surely by scaring them.

 

For example, there was a story about a family. They had an aquarium with a lot of fishes. One day, the kid accidentally killed the fish and just threw the body in a trash. At night, she was haunted by hundreds fishes laying on her bed and strange things happened. She had a vision of her parents turning into fish. Then the next morning she told her parents the truth and buried the fish corpse decently. But the story didn't end just like that. I really didn't understand why, but the family was ended being a real fish and went (or dead) to the ocean. (Too lazy to check my memories, sorry)

 

Okay, maybe I was wrong, or right. I don't really remember it well. But at least that's the example.

 

Mungkin cerita horrornya tidak terlalu seram, memang iya, tetapi setelah dipikir-pikir lagi, kalau cerita tersebut nyata, I'll shit on my pants. Karena ceritanya terlalu nampak nyata, itulah sisi seramnya. Tapi ada juga beberapa cerita yang too emotional. Bahkan gue nangis, YEAH I CRIED READING HORROR MANGA.

 

{ Overall Rate: 9 of 10

   Creepy Rate: 7 of 10 }

 

So...

 

Please, please read it.

 

Thank you,

 

Adios.

Intermezzo #1

Have you ever wished to have amnesia for a particular memory ?

Aku membuka mata perlahan dan melihat ke langit-langit. This is the reality. Aku mencoba bangun dari tidurku dengan berat hati. Perlahan aku mencoba mengumpulkan kesadaranku lagi.

Waktu baru menunjukkan pukul 7 pagi tetapi suasana hatiku sudah begitu buruk. Semalaman aku menangis dan kantung mataku menghitam dan bengkak. Aku masih bisa mengingat semuanya dengan jelas.

Episode final dari serial yang kutonton sama sekali menyebalkan bagiku. Selama setengah jam awal, aku dibuat menangis tiada henti. Seolah merasakan kesedihan yang nyata, aku menghabiskan air mataku sambil meraung-raung tidak bisa menerima kenyataan. Tiba-tiba di menit akhir, semuanya berubah. Aku merasa dibodohi. Selama 6 season, aku begitu kesal bukan main telah menyia-nyiakan air mata ini karena sang heroine mendapatkan happy ending.

Happy ending yang tabu. Aku seharusnya layak melihat sang heroine bahagia lebih lama lagi. Come on, i waited for it like forever. Dan kenyataannya, scene berakhir tepat disaat dia mulai merasakan happy ending.

It's so unfair. Ini adalah episode terakhir dari serial yang berarti aku tidak akan bisa melihat kelanjutannya lagi. Tidak adakah episode spesial atau... terserah apapun itu.

Kehidupanku akhirnya terombang-ambing. Setiap aku bangun, rasanya semangat itu hilang. Aku benar-benar merindukan serial itu hingga kupikir aku bisa menciptakan imajinasiku sendiri untuk menghidupkan karakter tersebut.

Tetapi kenyataannya, aku tidak bisa. Yang aku butuhkan adalah season baru, dan itu mustahil.

Menonton dari awal benar-benar percuma. Aku tidak suka mengulanginya karena sebelumnya sang heroine masih belum berubah karakternya. Lagipula aku juga sudah tidak akan puas dengan ceritanya karena aku sudah tahu dengan jelas.

Then, it felt like i was on the edge of my life.

Aku tidak bisa melakukan apapun untuk memuaskan dahaga ini.

Dan akhirnya,

Dengan bodoh aku berharap,

Bahwa aku bisa menghapus memoriku tentang serial tersebut lalu menontonnya kembali. Akhirnya aku akan jatuh cinta lagi dengan serial tersebut dan menikmati dengan sangat antusias.

Ah... Right...

The one that i desired was the thrill of anticipating the stories and falling in love with the plot, exactly like the first time...

Last Page of 2014

Aku membuka lembaran baru di sebuah kertas usang dan menipis setelah lembaran-lembaran yang penuh dengan kenangan terlewati. Aku menatap dalam-dalam lembar kosong di hadapanku.

It's the end of the pages.

Aku berpikir keras dan menarik memoriku setahun belakangan ini. Di lembar terakhir ini, seharusnya aku merekap semua kehidupanku di tahun ini, tetapi tidak ada satu konklusi yang berhasil kutangkap.

Dear diary. I'm still me, and i think that's not a great point. I'm still loving the same man without having any progress about him. I'm stil hating myself for being coward towards him. There is nothing different from me even after these years.

I haven't been on a diet, never putting a make up, or any effort for being prettier than ever. I'm still the old i am. I just got a deeper obsession of food and it's killing me.

All i know is that i'm lost and nobody has offered me a hand. Loneliness is the summary of my life this year. I thought it would be great, but this year just gave me a shit on my face.

I hope the next year would be nice...

Aku menutup buku tersebut, lalu diam. Pikiranku tidak sedang memikirkan apapun, sama sekali hingga aku mulai meresapi keheningan.

Well, at least my writings were not really bad as i thought...

How to Love Rains

Hello. I haven't posted anything since rainy seasons started. It's already November and i actually loved when this season has come. I am a public transportation user. Not a daily user, but i spent a lot of my times for going around the cities by public transportation.

Right now, i am writing this while using a bus to get to my place. It's raining now and the bus is getting cold. I loved it when rains came and i just stared to the outside.

I always wonder, why do people hate rains ?

Beside the flood, rains are the only condition when i couldn't see the sun. Ugh, i hate sun the most especially when it shines so brightly. I hate summer. The city would be so dry and hotter than usual. The cloudy weather is perfect.

Since it's November, 2015 will come soon.

Ah, i forgot one thing that i should tell ya. While it rains, why don't you take out your headphones and start to listen some musics, that perfectly match the weather ?

I have one song that recently added to my playlist, would you take a look please ?

Have you listened to The Rose by Bette Midler ? It's a classic song from the 90s. I didn't listen to the original singer actually. I prefer Aoi Teshima's version, the mp3's quality is better than the old one. Anyway, i heard this song once from a movie, it's "Obsessed". It is a romantic-thriller movie that played by (my dear) Song Seung Heon. The music was played for the ending. I watched it while holding my heart, it was really thrilling, heart trembling, and also heart breaking movie for me. You should watch it, i highly recommend it.

Forget about the movie, let's focus on the song. "The Rose" means a lot to me. I don't know if it is really the original meaning, but here is my perception of the song. The song talked about a first love. She talked about the explanation of love from the people. The feeling of the song made me feel excited yet fear, doubtful, and thrilled of love. I could feel the warmness of a young-yet-dangerous love. I don't know. I listened it first as a soundtrack, and it perfectly matched with the plot.

Maybe should i post a review for the movie ? I really liked it, everything about it. Song Seung Heon was the main reason, but i loved the plot and how the story swayed my emotions. Especially the ending. I mean, not the real ending, but the pre-ending, (SPAM Warning) when Song Seung Heon was drunk and revealed everything. I just couldn't expect that one, really.

Anyway, please please watch "Obsessed" movie and listened to "The Rose" song. Actually it's perfect for winter, but there is no snow here, so rains would be better.

Enjoy the rain ^^ !!

Salz.

Let's Talk About : Black Bird

Hi. It's me again.

Sebenernya gue cuma mau sedikit "curhat" disini. Recently, i just read a great manga. Judulnya "Black Bird" oleh Kanoko Sakurakoji. Well, ini bukan bagian dari rekomendasi, karena sejujurnya gue juga belum selesai baca sampe akhir dan bahkan gue gatau apakah komik ini sudah tamat apa belum. I just picked it by random. Benar-benar secara random. Gue ga akan secara langsung merekomendasikan kali ini, but i insist you to take a look at this manga.

The main reason for me to post this is because i cried reading it.

Ya, gue nangis di tengah cerita. Bodoh banget kalau dipikir-pikir lama, tapi airmata gue menetes begitu saja tanpa izin sama sekali. Parahnya, gue nangis di meja kantor saat ini. Tepat disaat gue masih magang dan banyak sekali orang lalu lalang lewat meja gue.

Tapi mau bagaimana lagi, i got swayed by the plot. Dan semuanya jelas-jelas mengarah ke satu point paling penting, it reminded me of my own stories. Sebenarnya gak terlalu mirip sih, cuma... Ada beberapa dialog yang paling membuat gue terlalu "nyess" sama diri gue sendiri. Fool me. 

Do You Believe in Magic?

Do you know the power of your mind ?

They rule your whole body.

I just woke up this morning and something happened.

I used to hide my memories about "a thing" and tried to live on. Until a day ago, whenever i saw "that thing" i was just trying to act cool. But then...

Bam.

It feels like my whole world is collapsing. I've been wasting my life by ignoring "that thing". Why did i hid one of my source of happiness ? Maybe my old-me was trying to not getting hurt again. All i've ever done was protecting myself from "something" that makes me happy yet hurtful, "something" that was the best yet the worst.

But the most of all, "this thing" is a lustful fantasy, a total fake hapiness. It represent a great desire of having with no possibility. "This thing" is destructive.

Can you guess what is "this thing" ?

Random Part 1

I cried. I cried a lot.

I looked other people and cried. When i looked at them and knew that we shared the same pain, i cried again.

How can i have such a lot of tears to let them out unknowingly?

I never cry over myself. But i cried for other things.

Well...

Thank you. At least i know that i also have a soul, a soul that ridiculously a cry-baby.

For whoever you are, whatever your story,

Crying with you was a big memory to me. Realizing that we shared the same pain was also a great feeling to me.

Yeah, you.

A little monster that lived in my heart.

A giant wrecker that crushed my heart.

And a shining star that blinked me.